Broken for a broken world

It stinks that if I’m out by myself and am approached by a man, my first instinct is to be defensive and protect myself. I’m not a feminist by any measure, and I have at least two male friends who have been sexually assaulted, this isn’t a male vs female issue. It’s a heart issue.

And boy, does it break mine. I wish I lived in a world that allowed us to openly trust one another without fear.


I am set free

It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.

~Galatians 5:1

God has set me free from sin, temptations, and fear. I am no longer a slave.

He has set me free from secrets, self-doubt, self-loathing and condemnation.

Stepping into the light, letting His glory shine down on even my darkest parts, He has made me new. Clean. Forgiven. A spotless bride before His throne.

I cannot express how extremely grateful I am that He loved me enough to not only die for me, but pursue me and woo me, take time and effort and endless resources to make sure that I know how loved and cherished I am to Him.

Where once I was bound by the flesh, He has severed my chains and given me life, eternal! Hallelujah!

I am currently waiting for for my favorite dude to get off work, as he has my car at the moment, and I told him I would help him cook this evening. (Mostly just keep him company while he cooks, he’s a better cook than I am by far.) And was just struck with the desire to express how awesome God has been to me. And that He longs to do the same for you. If you don’t know Christ as your Savior and Father, you are missing out on something spectacular. Not fire insurance, but on a relationship that far surpasses any earthly relationship you could ever make. God is seeking after you, to save you from yourself. And His love for you is greater than anything you could possibly imagine.

If you’re interested in finding out more, or have questions, please feel free to comment on this post and leave me a way to contact you, and I will be happy to reply. 🙂

Anyway, that’s all I really have to say at the moment. Hopefully my dude will show up soon. I have a hug for him that I’ve been saving all day! 😀




A Taste Of Adventure

So I’ve been back from Oklahoma for a few days now, been back to work, back in my own bed, back to the daily grind. (Does no one else think of coffee when you hear that phrase? It makes me want coffee…)

My second day back was kinda crazy, my mom came into my room and woke me up with the words “Moriah, I need your help, there’s blood all over the kitchen floor.” As it turned out, my rambunctious and prey driven dog Camo, an Akita/Labrador cross, took off so hard that he ripped open his claw horizontally, all the way into the toe. Looked like a crime scene. I took him to the vet who sedated him, cut off the dangling portion of claw, cleaned it with a saline wash and squirted superglue into the open part of the claw to prevent bleeding. After a day of being high on drugs, he was still whimpering from pain and his toe very swollen, so the vet gave him three pills to take daily, a pain reliever, an anti-inflammatory and an antibiotic. Now he seems much more comfortable and much happier, though still limping some. Silly pup.

My trip was great! Getting to travel alone was very confidence boosting. Nice to know that I can as a matter of fact, make it on my own. Be independent. The wedding was great, I met lots of interesting, fun people, and I had a lot of spontaneous fun, both solo and with my cousins friends. I swam in a saltwater pool every day at the hotel, went to a free concert downtown with a group of people, walked to little cafe’s and diners alone downtown several times, and experienced the fear/rush of having to find my departure gate in the Atlanta airport. Which ended up being a long walk, train ride, and two escalators away from my arrival gate. It was such a liberating time. I actually felt like an adult, not in the “back to work to earn money because I’m an adult” way that I normally do, but in the “I can make decisions for myself and find my own way without help because I’m an adult” way. Normally, because I live with my parents, if I get invited to something or want to go somewhere, I have to ask them first and can’t really be “spontaneous”. But while I was there, no one was really “responsible” for me, my grandparents sort of were, but not to the same degree as my parents would be. So when I was invited somewhere or decided I wanted to walk to a cafe and get lunch, I just went. Maybe told them I was leaving before I went, but didn’t “ask permission” to go. It was awesome. It made me wish I could afford a small apartment of my own nearby, so I could have that sort of freedom at home. But, sadly, a part time Pet Care Associate at Petsmart does not make enough to pay rent or water or electric bills. Unless you want to go without food. Then it might be possible!

The month after next I’ll be turning 21. If you follow my blog and read it much I’m sure you’ll correctly assume that they’ll be no “partying” or getting drunk for my 21st, but there WILL be alcohol. Not much, just some. There’s an apple ale that I’ve wanted to try for a long time, so I’m thinking of buying just one bottle (beer bottle sized bottle) of it to try. It’ll probably be nasty, but that’s okay. If I’ve never made it clear before, I don’t have an issue with drinking, I have an issue with getting drunk. So, if you can’t have just one glass of wine or just one beer, don’t drink. If that’s not a temptation for you, by all means, enjoy your one glass. Some people are more sensitive to the effects of alcohol and probably should not drink, so if that’s you, don’t. Some people have alcoholism in their family history and thus wish to avoid it altogether, and I highly respect and honor that decision, and if it bothers them to have others drink around them, I would definitely never drink while with them. If I married a man who felt that way, it would be my pleasure to honor him by never drinking again. But, as that is not the case for my birthday, I’m going to have my one small drink. Funny enough, I love margaritas, but only when there isn’t any tequila in them. I like just the crushed ice and the fruit flavored mix, so it’s like a slushy. Tequila is so sharp, it ruins it completely. Which amused my father when he made me an alcohol-free margarita a while back. ^_^ I think they call that a “virgin” margarita, but I have an issue with using the word virgin to describe anything other than what the bible uses it for. Just a personal preference, I like to keep certain important words holy.

I think that’s one of the ways our culture has degraded itself, using meaningful words flippantly so many times that they no longer have weight when used. Much like the word “awesome”, which should mean “inspires awe”, but we use it to describe everything. I’m guilty of this too, but after trying for like a month to stop using it, I never managed to prevent it from slipping out. So I gave up. 😛 I don’t think God minds, or at least he hasn’t seen fit to press upon me the need to change that verbal habit. And he does with other things regularly. Such as “suck”, as in “that sucks” which I feel very convicted about not using, “screwed up”, “pissed off” or using “god” as an expression of anything other than speaking about God himself. Though the first three of those are not “bad words” per se, I feel that the use of them is tacky, degrading, and does not conform to any of the biblical standards of what our speech should be as holy children of God. And the bible makes it extremely clear that God’s name is holy and not to be misused, so it’s important to me to honor that.

For those of my non-Christian followers who look at Christianity as a list of do’s and don’ts, I hope you realize that I don’t put these parameters on myself because I think God won’t love me if I don’t or because I think it’s what I have to do, I do it because God died for me so I can have eternal life, and I want to honor him in anyway I possibly can. I do it because I want to. Because by doing it, I set a better example of the purity of Christ, so others will be less distracted by me and more attracted to Him. My personality, my appearance, are works of art that he created, drawing some attention to myself in the right way is fine, but distracting people with crass speech or unkind words is not. Or immodest clothing, actually. Immodest clothes distract the minds of both men and women and takes their thoughts off of what is pure and right and tempts them into either lustful thoughts or criticizing thoughts, whereas attractive, modest clothing causes appreciation of the excellent design and beauty God created. Which I think it pretty awesome.

Anyway, I’m kind of wasting my day off by sitting on the couch in gym cloths. I will actually go to the gym…. Eventually…

He Is Able

“Now to him who is able to keep you from falling, and make you stand without blemish in the presence of his glory with rejoicing, to the only God our Savior, through Jesus Christ or Lord, be glory, majesty, power, and authority, before all time and now and forever. Amen.”

-Jude 13:24

Tired & Torn


Sometimes I’m tired of being brave.

Of going out into a world of hostility and putting on a good face.

I struggle to keep smiling when I have to fight just to stay me.

To keep myself from the habits of those surrounding me.

Staying on the higher ground.

When a word of profanity tickles my tongue and I have to bite it.

When a hostile attitude boils within me and I struggle to remember to Whom I belong.

At every turn, I see only obstacles.

I feel as though I clamber over them,

No one by my side.

Is it too much to ask for a friend who cheers me on rather than telling me to turn back?

We could help each other over the mountains,

Stroll through the valleys in unison.

Don’t tell me my fight is pointless,

Don’t tell me I try too hard.

Tell me to push harder, to strive to be more.

Tell me my quest is worthy,

Take my hand and join me.

Maybe we won’t scale every mountain,

Maybe we won’t always win.

But God is on our side, my friend,

And He has concurred sin.

Is Marriage…okay?

Safari Desktop Picture

For years I’ve read countless books on singleness, marriage, love, relationships, sex, etc, trying to mature my views and my heart as to what God asks of me, and to make sense of the ache in my heart. What I’ve found is that Genesis has the simplest answer to all of my questions.

“The LORD God said, ‘It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.’

So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and then closed up the place with flesh. Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. Then the man said, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.”

Genesis 2:18, 21-23

I put in bold the wording that really stands out to me.

Even in perfect unity with God, Adam’s relational status was not deemed “good” by the Creator until he had Eve.

There are those called to remain single, but honestly, that is (and should be) very few of us. We were not designed for it, plain and simple. And not just because we have a sex drive. It has very little to do with that. Marriage is one of the strongest forces on earth, capable of humbling us, teaching us selfless, righteous love. Marriage isn’t to make you happy, it is to make you holy. It is true that you should learn to be happy in your singleness and focus on Christ, but I wouldn’t go so far as to say you must be content in your singleness. It’s a nearly impossible goal. God didn’t expect Adam to be content without Eve. And that wasn’t because he “couldn’t control himself sexually”. After all, there was no sin, and until the creation of Eve, the thought of sex wouldn’t have entered his mind. He didn’t even know what a woman would look like.

We need companionship. The kind that connects us at the soul level, which is something that only marriage can truly bring. To be fully and completely known by another human and loved anyway is one of God’s most amazing gifts.

Secular culture is screaming at us that we can sleep with whomever we want to and do whatever we want to.

I’ve noticed the Christian trend is often saying we ought to remain single if we can “control ourselves”.

Extremes are not the answer. We are designed to be tied together by Christ with one person and through that relationship, God will smooth our rough edges, teach us how to truly love, and as a team the three of you (Yourself, your spouse and Christ) can accomplish amazing things for His Kingdom.

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.

~Ephesians 5:25-27

The man who finds a wife finds a treasure, and he receives favor from the LORD.

~Proverbs 18:22

A wife of noble character is her husband’s crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones.

~Proverbs 12:4

“Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.

~Ephesians 5:31-32

The Bible is packed with verses about marriage, speaking about it’s benefits, spiritually, mentally, physically and emotionally. Why we’ve taken one section in 1 Corinthians 7 and made it into this false ideal. Paul was given a very unique calling in which he couldn’t have been married. His purpose on this earth was fantastic, but full of pain and strife that a marriage just didn’t fit. God is merciful. Paul was given the gift of singleness (read “He no longer had a strong desire for a marriage relationship). Paul says in 1 Corinthians 7:1-9:

Now for the matters you wrote about: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.” But since sexual immorality is occurring, each man should have sexual relations with his own wife, and each woman with her own husband. The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife. Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. I say this as a concession, not as a command. I wish that all of you were as I am. But each of you has your own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that.

Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I do. But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

(Note: “Widows” in that era were women no longer of childbearing age whose husbands died and were given the job of guiding younger women and being prayer warriors for the church. They had a very important roll in the church family. However, girls widowed while young were not to be cared for by the church, but were to remarry. If you doubt this, do some research about Hebrew culture at this time.)

Later in verses 25-40 he explains his view on this further, and a if you remember to read this in context with what was happening to the Christian church at the time, you will begin to see a new perspective. He begins with this:

Now about virgins: I have no command from the Lord, but I give a judgment as one who by the Lord’s mercy is trustworthy. Because of the present crisis, I think that it is good for a man to remain as he is.

When you look back historically, the church was under attack. Christian men and women were in the midst of a different era. If you couldn’t control your lust, then get married, otherwise spread God’s word and try not to get martyred. Not a quote obviously, but that’s basically what it boils down to. If a man is asked to denounce Christ or be burnt at the stake, he can take that upon himself and ask God for the strength to hold out. But if a man is told to renounce Christ or watch his wife be burned… That is a whole different level of pain.

Paul mentions that a married man or woman’s interests are divided between God and their spouse, and that is true. However, living in such a way that you love your spouse with a Christlike love is one of the best ways to grow in righteousness. Concerning yourself with your spouses well being humbles you. Loving your spouse is a ministry. Not just to their heart, but in the hearts of those who see this love being played out. Learning to appreciate God’s design of your spouse is an experience of worship.

When I read 1 Corinthians 7, I see a highly misunderstood letter that is filled with wisdom primarily directed at those who originally received it. The church members in Corinth. It must be understood in the context of it’s time. Not that it doesn’t have merit now, those rare few who are given the gift of “singleness” (read, the gift of a lessened desire for a spouse) are more free to focus on certain aspects of God’s Kingdom. A different part of the Kingdom than that which married couples are to tackle together with team work.

If you desire a spouse, but are currently single, odds are some well meaning friend has said to you, “Maybe you are called to/been given the gift of singleness.” Noo. The “gift of singleness” isn’t that you can’t seem to get a date and thus will be single for life. It’s that your desire for a spouse is lessened by God and replaced with a stronger desire for and contentment in Him alone.

Desiring a spouse doesn’t mean God “isn’t enough”, it means God’s plan is  meant to be fully realized by the connection and humility you will gain by having a spouse.

I’ve written two other blogs similar to this, feel free to check them out.

Ministry or Marriage?

I’m Looking For Someone To Share In An Adventure

What Are We Doing?

See why we have an absolutely ridiculous standard of beauty in just 37 seconds.

Warning: This video shows a topless woman, you side the side of her breast slightly. Men, if you think that will cause you to stumble, please don’t risk temptation. 🙂 

Watching this makes me sad. Because I too have looked at these oddly perfect pictures and thought “I wish I looked like that”. But the truth is, no one does. It’s a lie that has been so deeply embedded in the hearts of men and women in this culture, it’s making us seek out something we cannot and should not desire.